Where Everybody Knows Your Name

Remember the old TV sitcom Cheers? At the time it was one of my favourite sitcoms, in part because I always wanted to have a bar where I could go in and, as the song goes, “where everybody knows your name”. I always thought of myself as a Norm type. Norm Peterson was the rather large fellow who would plant his arse on a corner stool and, for the most part, remain there for the entire show. Every time Norm would enter the bar all of the patrons and staff would welcome him with an enthusiastic - What’s Up Norm!



Well tonight I think I have finally found my place. It all started 18 or 24 months ago when my friend John and I went into this place in Newmarket for wings and a beer before heading off to the movies. The staff were friendly and I recall that John and I teased them about the lack of salt shakers as we both enjoy a dash of salt in our draft. As a joke when we left that night we decided to return the following week armed with a box of salt and an array of salt shakers. True to our vow we did just that the following week and for one reason or another it became our tradition to show up each week armed with a different salt and pepper set. Now these weren’t just ordinary run-of-the-mill salt and pepper sets. No siree Bob! John and I searched the entire province of Ontario to find sets that were unique in their design. We showed up with sets in the form of animals, fish, fruit, and even one set that was a toaster with the two bread slices, one for pepper the other for salt. But I digress from the story. More about our salt and pepper shakers next week if I get permission to take pictures of same.



The long and short of it was that the staff got to know who we were and I dare say looked forward to seeing what new entry would grace the walls of their fine establishment each week. Not that the staff knew our names. Initially we were known as the salt and pepper gang and later after much discussion, the Salt Cartel. The Cartel grew to three members earlier this year when our mutual friend Darlene decided to join us on a regular basis. But again I digress from the main point which is why I now feel at home in this establishment.

The feeling was firmly established last week when The Cartel was invited to the staff Christmas party. Unfortunately, while greatly honoured to have been invited, we were unable to attend. Tonight, much to our surprise, we were given a Christmas card by one of the owners of the establishment. The card thanked us for our patronage throughout the year and was signed by the entire staff. The card also contained a certificate for $50! Ahhhh - now that is true spirit of Christmas and why I now feel that this is the place “where everybody knows my name”.

I encourage all of you who read this and live in the area to visit my home away from home where the staff are extremely friendly and the wings and beer are fantastic. More on this wonderful establishment next week. By the way - tonight was an elephant whose bottom half was pepper and the top half salt.

Wild Wing
Western Produce Plaza
16635 Yonge St. #17 A
Newmarket, Ont.
(905) 830 - 1515

By the way - for those of you unfamiliar with the Norm Peterson humour I have included a few ‘Normisms’

"Can I draw you a beer Norm ?"
"No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one."

"How's a beer sound Norm ?"
"I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in."

"What would you say to a beer Normie ?"
"Daddy wuvs you."

"Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you ?"
"Like a baby treats a diaper."

"Hey Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you."
"I know, if she calls, I'm not here."

"Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson ?"
"Alright, but stop me at one...  make that one-thirty."

"How's it going Mr. Peterson ?"
"It's a dog eat dog world, Woody & I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear."

"What's the story Norm ?"
"Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer."

"Can I pour you a beer Mr. Peterson ?"
"A little early isn't it, Woody ?"
"For a beer ?"
"No, for stupid questions."